Being a teenage girl in this world is difficult. Sometimes, it seems impossible. In this article, we will tackle one of the most common issues in young girls: caring about what people say or think about you. Hopefully, these steps will transition you to get rid of this mindset!
First, there are a few things you must realize
- Listening to others gets you no where: Think about it. When you listen to all the toxicity from others, do you get anywhere? Do you benefit from it? Do you feel happier? Of course not.
- Wasting Time: Listening, believing, or even crying about what someone spat out is such a waste of time. You have to realize it. Yes, it hurts in the beginning. And your feelings are completely justified. But that time you spent, you could have finished a book, baked a cake, learned a new song, or painted your nails. Learn how to be protective over your time.
- Think about it like this – “My time is my time, and I’m going to spend it how I want to. If I want to do nothing all day, I won’t commit to plans. If I want to spend the day for a commitment I made to myself, it won’t be interrupted by someone else.”
Now that you have realized these things, it’s time to practice.
#1 Write Your Feelings Down
- Whether you pick your Notes app or a piece of scrap paper, just spill out everything on the page. Everything you felt that day, like what bothered you, annoyed you, etc. Don’t worry about grammar, spelling, or tidiness.
- As you are writing down your feelings, you might cry or get frustrated. That’s okay! Use this paper as an emotion dumper. And once you’re done, take a break. Go do something you enjoy. Then, come back and read what you wrote. See if you have a different perspective now. Try to conclude some points off of your feelings. You might notice you have to have more fun, relax more, or set up a routine.
- To make this journey a personal one, you can shred or rip these pages – It wouldn’t be fun to have someone reading them in secret. This activity makes you super self aware, which is vital to achieve this new mindset.
#2 Practice Confidence
This is the key to stop caring. If you build that confidence, you shouldn’t have to consider the negative. You’ll know your worth and what you choose to care about.
GirlSpring has many articles on building confidence. Check them out here!
- How To Build Self-Esteem And Confidence As A Teen Girl
- Ready To Take On New Challenges? 4 Tips To Start 2022 With Confidence and Happiness
- How To Feel Good About Yourself & Boost Your Self-Confidence
- Here’s how you Deal with Body Confidence and Self-Esteem Issues
#3 Fake it Till’ You Make it
- “Fake it till you make it” is a popular saying that means to keep faking something until you actually achieve it. In this case, imitating confidence until you have it. Yes, this concept might seem peculiar or unworthy. In fact, it might not work for some people, and that’s fine. However, keeping this quote close by really helps.
#4 Cut Out the Producers
- Do you remember an organism classification – autotroph vs heterotroph? Well, you probably learned it in middle school science class. Autotrophs are producers. Heterotrophs are consumers. If your issue is worrying about others, there’s obviously a cause. There’s something that produces this negative lifestyle.
- Keyword– produces. These producers, or autotrophs, are “feeding” you with bad thoughts and comments. Some people that are “autotrophs” may pop into your head. Will you choose to be their heterotroph? Will you choose to consume and live off of their toxicity? Quit being the heterotroph or cut out the autotroph. Dropping toxic people can be very hard, but it is worth it. You will be so much happier, and most likely, you won’t even know them five years from now.
#5 Start Challenging Yourself
- Have you taken on a challenge recently? If not, you need to! Part of personal growth is gaining achieved challenges. Once you put yourself out there and try new things, your confidence will skyrocket. Correspondingly, when negative comments come, you will be reminded of the challenges you overcame. These challenges can be talking to at least two new people at a gathering, learning a new hobby, or educating yourself about a topic in under a short amount of time.
- Therefore, being confident in the things you’ve achieved helps. It’s like “bouncing back.” If someone says something, just say to yourself: “Really? Well how come I did this challenge last year, won there, and mastered that? Hmm.”
Photo by Jim De Ramos on Pexels
That’s about it! Even if it takes years, just be consistent. However, be aware of situations; there’s a difference between not caring and being blatantly disrespected. Even if something doesn’t affect your confidence, it may be crossing boundaries that you might need to make clear. Keep your head up! It’s a voyage, but you can make it if you are consistent and never, ever give up!