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Finding the Good in the Bad: Dealing with Divorced Parents

divorced parents

Watching your parents go through a divorce is one of the toughest parts of life any child can go through; regardless of age. Whether you’ve experienced this as a child or an adult, there are positive lessons that come from the difficult process. 

If you found out your parents are getting divorced know that everything will be okay, and whatever you’re feeling is normal. Here are answers to some of the questions you may have.

It’s an End, But it Makes A New Beginning

A divorce is technically the end of a relationship. Despite that, it proves that in life, it’s never too late to make a change and find your happiness. It’s never easy to watch two people, originally thought to be together forever, split up. But if you keep the possibility of their happiness in mind, it’s easier to understand the steps they have to take to get there. Everyone deserves to be happy, even if that means taking some less-than-ideal steps along the way.  

Sometimes, we can get caught up in seeing our parents as a unit with their sole purpose being to raise us. We forget that they had a life before having kids. That their personalities masked due to only viewing them as a mom or dad. They’re actually real people with real feelings. 

In negative situations, our negative qualities are brought out. A divorce results in the separation of two people. But it also is the separation of the cynical and pessimistic emotions that stem from overall unhappiness. Divorce isn’t ideal, but it results in seeing your parents as individual people. People with dreams, unique characteristics, and emotions completely separate from their children.

The technical term for divorce, without relation to marriage, is to separate or dissociate from something else. Similarly, the definition of independent is not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence. 

The Main Thing to Take Away From Divorce

The main lesson that can come from divorce is independence. Life doesn’t end with one bump in the road, and it’s possible to be content without relying on another person. Seeing our parents as individuals focusing on their own personal happiness, no matter how hard at first, is an inspiration to find happiness in ourselves first.

Young or old, watching your parents go through a divorce is difficult for everyone involved. But, like all painful experiences, it provides the opportunity for a positive mindset and lifelong lessons. 

Just remember: you aren’t the reason your parents divorced. You can take this crazy time and make something amazing out of it!


Shannon Angel is studying at the University of Alabama and is doing an internship this semester at GirlSpring.

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